I have a confession.

I buy my kids Valentine’s Day gifts.

Nothing huge. Nothing over the top. But yes, they wake up to a little surprise from Mom and Dad. And every year I have the same thought in the back of my mind…
Is this normal?
Or am I slowly turning Valentine’s Day into Christmas part two?

Because depending on who you ask, Valentine’s Day is either for couples, for friendships, or not a big deal at all. Meanwhile I’m over here putting chocolate on the breakfast table for my boys like Cupid personally asked me to.

And honestly… I don’t fully know if it’s right or wrong.

Where Did This Even Come From

Somewhere along the way, holidays changed. They became less about strict rules and more about connection. And as a mom, any chance to make my kids feel loved feels worth taking.

But I do sometimes wonder if we overdo it. Do kids need gifts for every occasion? Are we creating expectations? Or are we just creating memories?

The truth probably lives somewhere in the middle.

What Valentine’s Day Actually Means Living with Three Dudes

In our house, it is never about expensive presents. It is small things. A favorite candy for Greyson. A funny trinket for Hudson. Maybe a cozy pair of socks for Nick. He needs them, trust me! I am hoping what they really love is the moment. The surprise. The feeling that someone thought about them first thing in the morning.

And when I step back, I realize that is the part that matters.

Because the holiday is not actually about romance. It is about love. And kids deserve to experience love that is gentle, safe, and unconditional long before they grow up and go looking for it somewhere else.

Making Space for Every Kind of Love

This year Nick and I actually did something different for Valentine’s Day. We went to a wellness center and intentionally slowed down together. Sauna, salt cave, brainwave therapy, and even a floating mineral bath. By the end we felt completely relaxed and honestly rejuvenated, like we had reset for another year of marriage. There is something about sitting in robes next to each other with nowhere to be that makes the time feel extra special.

And because we did not want the boys to feel left out, we followed it with a Valentine’s dinner with them.

I will be honest. It was not quite as peaceful as the spa.

But they practiced table manners, learned that you cannot order one buffet and have the entire family share it, and we laughed the whole way through. So I still count it as a win.

Maybe that is the balance. Romance and family. Quiet connection and loud togetherness. Both matter.

But Are We Doing Too Much

Here is where I question myself. Valentine’s Day was never meant to be another pressure filled holiday. It does not need elaborate Valentine Boxes or expensive gifts.

Sometimes I think we are not buying things because kids need them. We are doing it because we enjoy expressing love in tangible ways. And maybe that is okay as long as the message stays clear.

The gift is not the point. The love is.

Maybe It Changes as They Grow

One day they will not wake up at home on Valentine’s Day. One day someone else will matter more than a chocolate heart from Mom. And honestly, that is how it should be although that makes my stomach hurt.

But right now, they are here.

So, I will keep the small traditions. The little surprises. The quiet reminders that love lives in this house long before the world tells them what love is supposed to look like.

Not because it is necessary.
Because it is meaningful.

I hope they see how Nick treats me on Valentine’s Day and do the same for their wives. Who knows? Maybe their kids will get some chocolate too.

Want More Pretty Truth in Your Life?

If you enjoy these honest motherhood moments and reflections on everyday life, you will love my book, The Pretty Truth.

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Xo, Maria

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